|added Thu July 29 2004 at 10:36 PM
|I had an interesting discussion with Ben today. Ben's my Elder's Quorum President. If I knew how to spell his last name, I would have called him President [fill in the blank], but I don't, so I won't. The discussion doubled as a PPI (Personal Priesthood Interview), but in reality it was a continuation of a chat we'd started a few days earlier about me and reasons why I hesitate about serving a mission. Either that, or the discussion earlier was a precursor for the one today.
Whether he was talking to me as an EQP or a concerned friend doesn't really matter to me. One thing I mentioned that's caught in my mind since is how I'm so stubborn and pig-headed that I seem to push against whatever society pushes me into. For instance, I find that everybody is expecting me to go on a mission, so maybe I'm trying to prove to them that they can't rule me. If I were living in different circumstances, would I be trying harder to go on a mission? I'm not sure.
I really don't think that I am actually pushing against the expectations to be a "good Mormon boy," but would a strong opposition make me try harder to be the person I should be? If everybody around me had low moral standards, would mine sink down to their level, or would I become even more firm as I throw my defenses up and barricade the doors against the heavy attacks?